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Infertility: Why me?

Updated: Dec 4, 2019

A question that naturally haunts all women with the challenge of fertility. I say ‘naturally’ because we question ‘Why?’ with all of our life events, whether a partner leaves us, we are made redundant or we get a serious illness. What this question really means is that where our lives are concerned, we all like to feel that we have some form of control over what happens to us, so when we are faced with something that feels like it is out of our control we look outside ourselves for the answer.

So it is very normal to suddenly feel overwhelmed as often there are no answers. Your imagination runs wild as you search and search for the answers. This may make us turn to doctors, consultants, drugs and eventually assisted reproductive treatments, such as IVF. And you know what - this is okay. Isn't it great that we have that determination and natural search for a 'solution'? No one should be judged for how they handle their problem.

Frequently when facing fertility problems, it leads to anxiety, money worries, false hopes, dashed hopes, a life put on hold, difficulties in your relationship, deep upset when faced with people at work falling pregnant and when you even see pregnant women. This is very natural as the worst thing about fertility issues is that you face this huge roller-coaster of emotions every month. It’s hard - so let yourself be and praise yourself and your partner for having the strength to get through it so far.

So what can you do? Answer: start to take back control of your fertility by putting in place action plans devised with someone experienced in fertility. It is predicted that soon fertility issues will affect 1 in 3 couples: there is a reason for this - our lifestyle. So when asking 'Why me?', rest assured it isn't just you and once you understand what is going on in your body, this question wont be relevant to you. The keys to taking back control are:

1. Put in place an action plan that will help you prepare your body for fertility and good general health.

2. Get emotional support that focuses on changing the emphasis of your life and particularly your thinking.

3. Practise this emotional support when you feel anxious, stressed and unable to cope

4. Don't allow test results to leave you feeling hopeless.

Action Plan

By working with a proven action plan, you can be more fertile that you ever have been. Many clients I have worked with conceive after just a couple of months of following their plan. Why? Very simply, the body changes and heals once it is getting what is needs and STOPS getting what is doesn't need.

I have worked with women from all walks of fertility issues and their worst moments and anxiety come from test results. When you first start to suspect fertility issues the tests start. They way I deal with this is to look at it like taking a driving test without taking the lessons. Your fertility is a secondary body system and not primary. This means that where you body is lacking certain crucial minerals and vitamins the fertility system never gets what it needs. With my clients we change this and allow your body to get what it needs. The simplest of these core building blocks is Vitamin D which we are all short of in this country. Supplementation of this vitamin can even heal PCOS.

It is about changing sperm and egg quality and absolutely that is totally possible.

I’ve had women come to me who have been devastated when told your not ovulating. Not told that this can change each month. Sadly, sometimes if your cycles are irregular the hormone level tests are done at the wrong time of the month and therefore cannot give correct information. Another client was told she had critically low AMH levels, a test designed to tell you how your egg reserve is and supposedly something you cannot heal or change. Well that same client failed IVF and worked with me and healed her AMH levels and fell pregnant just a few months after using my plan for pregnancy.

I've also worked with a man with such negative sperm the IVF clinic have said there is no help. I've seen this man go on to follow my plan and get a new diagnosis of 'super sperm'. You can change egg and sperm quality easily.

So be careful what information you believe. Try to trust your intuition about the correct treatment for you. IVF is very common now but is not an easy journey. Simply put IVF is just a new opportunity as is each month.

We are programmed by media to believe you will struggle to get pregnant after the age of about 35. We are also programmed to think pregnancy is easy by needing the pill to protect us form pregnancy. This makes us stress very quickly if we are not falling pregnant quite quickly after trying to conceive (TTC).

If you give your control away it will leave you feel such anxiety. You need someone like me to advise you, support you with a clear, easy and highly specialised action plan. The worst thing to do it to try and cope alone and stay in that place of 'lack of control'.

I work to empower women to start living a full and happy life once a plan is in place. It is about changing our thinking and challenging 'what is true'. I hear women so often believe their THOUGHTS and these thoughts are so often not true and base on no evidence - just FEAR. Fear stands for 'false evidence appearing real'. So before you think 'why cant I get pregnant' challenge that thought as not true. Unless you have done 100% of a tailored action plan there is more you can do to increase your chances of pregnancy - a a very healthy one at that.

The same plan works well for ladies who have experienced recurrent miscarriage problems.

Try not to sit in just hope - go into action. Action releases us. I help ladies to reconnect with and embrace their femininity, your sexuality and your creativity. To start dressing like a fertile sexy woman and to get out of tiredness, over-worked, over-stressed, black clothes, no make-up and a feeling of lack. It is about starting to change your lifestyle with the help you need.

I run one-on-one intensive Fertility Kick off sessions that change things quickly. I also mini fertility retreats where women come and meet and face the challenge of fertility together.

Everyone needs fertility education in our modern lifestyle and that is what you need to turn things around for you.

If you want to speak to me and understand how I have the great success rates I have with Mama Be then get in touch and do it today!

Written by Katharine Gailard, Mama Be programme founder

Contact details: 07747 630119

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